The last four decades ending in “8”, I have started on a new path. In 1978 I moved from North Carolina to NYC to pursue my acting career, separating from my 4-year marriage. In 1988, I began studying at Union Theological Seminary and a new career in ministry. In 1998, following my interest in alternative healing, I went to Peru for the first time where I met two shamanic spiritual teachers.

 

It's 2008 and once again, I begin anew. Having apprenticed with shamans in Peru for eight years, I have begun to teach the Andean Spiritual Tradition in my own way, focusing more on the feminine within the tradition and sharing it with others in a sacred circle rather than a vertical hierarchy.

 

But the bigger more challenging new beginning for me this year is my budding relationship with Christer, the Swedish business consultant who came to Peru last June on a spiritual karmic quest. His tour group was booked to do a one-day workshop with me and spend that night at my Peace and Light Center in Cusco's Sacred Valley.

 

Our hands touched, each right on the other's left, after the first morning session. There was a strong current pulsing through us in a rapid circular motion. We looked into each other's eyes saying nothing. This connection happened “by chance” and left me feeling intrigued. I thought perhaps he was an energy healer (because I didn't yet know his background – only his name and that he lived in Stockholm).

 

At the end of an exhausting day in which I did five private healing sessions after the day-long workshop, Christer approached me at the door of my house and asked, “What was that – the energy flowing through our hands this morning?” My heart started to pound as if it had just occurred to me that I was attracted to this tall gray haired handsome Swede. I hoped he was not asking for my professional opinion. “I don't know”, I said, “but if you'd like to talk about it, come on in. Would you like a glass of wine?” I asked so he'd know I was “off duty”.

 

We talked with each other like old friends. The strength of our energy connection was matched by the connection of our personal interests, spiritual journeys and mutual attraction. We talked all night, saying goodbye as his group departed at 6am for their train to Machu Picchu. He had a week left in Peru and said he would try to come back before going home.

 

Two days later we met in Cusco and he spent the rest of his week with me. We wondered where the relationship would lead. He was interested in coming back to Peru to live, he told me. “OK, let's see what happens.” I ended up going to visit him in Stockholm for 10 days, three months later. By the end of December, he had moved to Pisac (albeit with only one suitcase, keeping his apartment in Stockholm) - for a test run, so to speak.

 

Part of me is thrilled to have found a partner with whom to share my life and work. The other part of me is slightly terrified since I managed to live the last 24 years quite happily on my own. Do I really need another new beginning?

 

The one that started in 1988, led me to Johannesburg, South Africa just after the liberation of Nelson Mandela. I ran a church-based community outreach program for the homeless, including a drop-in center, support group, job creation projects and a weekly healing workshop. It was the healing work that lead me to Peru. I bought land in the Sacred Valley and began by building a house with guest rooms that soon turned into a B&B, healing center and conference center. Each step I felt I was where I was meant to be, doing the work I was meant to do. My life has been full and meaningful.

 

It did occur to me however that getting to be fifty something without having a long-term romantic relationship of more than 4 years could mean that there was an area of my life that might still need some growth, healing, transformation. For more than 20 years I've had conversations with God during my meditations. One day last year we discussed this subject. I said if I could heal whatever it was on my own, great. I would make that my intention. If I needed a relationship to do that work, then please deliver the appropriate man to my doorstep. This was my request.

 

Be careful what you ask for, my friend Wendy always says. So here I am with this wonderful opportunity for which I am both grateful and somewhat perplexed. In seminary I was trained as a marriage counselor. I know about active listening, family patterns and miscommunication that creates problems in relationships. But I wasn't prepared for falling into these traps myself! Nor was I prepared for how difficult it can be to open your home and your heart to another, even one as sweet and handsome as my dear Christer.

 

New beginnings. I guess they are always full of both joy and trepidation. I can't wait to see where this one takes me. Sorry, no words of advice yet. Except: if you are following your heart's desire, every so often you have to begin anew.